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Hello Dear Friends,
I was talking to a friend about the current cycle we're in. Of course, I've thoroughly enjoyed the Mercury Retrograde and up to this point, I've been reliving some wonderful experiences. But, remember when last spring, we were talking about the big grand cross and the serious tone that it would blow into our lives? Well, I learned something about the power of transits - they can happen in our lives softly almost negligibly.
I actually said to my friend, "I was anticipating more thunder and all I got was a little rain" to which she replied, " Are you kidding?" She proceeded to remind me of the death of my dad and the resulting shift my entire life took. "Oh yeah" I muttered, feeling like an idiot. But then it came flooding in. . .
I was in the midst of tending to things for my Dad's funeral and was reading in the paper that my High School reunion was on the day of his funeral. You see, millions of times I thought about someday going to my high school reunion. I imagined being thin and rich, taking time to hear about their lives while noticing how amazing they thought I looked. I would, in my fantasy, be kind and attentive. I would offer genuine looks of sadness or surprise based on their stories and then I'd bid them adieu, knowing that they'd say, "What an amazing guy he turned out to be...He did it!"
Well, since thin or rich never happened, I resigned to the fact that I'd never go to a high school reunion, why would I walk into one of the most excruciating experiences of my existence? But I didn't have to worry, being the loving God that I hear he is, God decides to take me at my worst moment and sends the entire graduating class to meet me there - at the funeral (okay, not the entire class but what difference does it make).
And you know how people say, 'You look so Good!" when they are being polite? Didn't happen. Not once because in this story, they all looked amazing!!! I hated each of them equally. They were all seemingly successful, looked 10 years younger than their ages and were doing all the things I fantasized I'd be doing to them (being empathetic, listening, kind - God, I hated them). LOL. I didn't write you that so you'd say, "something nice" I wrote that so you'd see that I summarized a pretty intense time as "Nothing much happened".
I've always said, "As humans, we pretty much suck at honest "self-evaluation". Life is hard enough without having to admit we're jealous of half the world or that all food is comfort food or that you're carrying a secret that will cost you lots of trust if you tell it. We also have to deal with crazy random chaos everyday - so I applaud your coping mechanisms, whatever they are. In conclusion, it's probably not that we're no good at Self-Evaluation, we're probably just tired of it. Here's to a happy denial, whatever that is for you and you can thank the Mercury Retrograde for giving us the chance to rewrite history.
Until next week,
I'm with you on the Quest!
Mark
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| by Mo Abdelbaki |
One day this spring I looked in my almanac and noted that sunset occurred at 7:25 PM. I wondered how long it takes to see stars after sunset so I put on my coat and hat, walked to the edge of my driveway and looked up. I was surprised at how much light there is after the sun goes down and more surprised that I'd never noticed that fact before.
My neighbors already think I'm strange and my scanning the horizon for a first twinkle probably reinforced that belief. More than one curious soul stepped out on their porch to see what that strange man with the odd hair was doing.
As it got darker, my anticipation grew. I checked my watch again; it was twenty minutes past sunset and still no stars. We were still in Civil Twilight.
There are three divisions of twilight: Civil, Nautical and Astronomical. The brightest stars in the sky usually first appear during Civil Twilight and I was becoming impatient.
There! No, that was an airplane.
Aha! Nope, that was a bat.
Then without fanfare or warning, as if by magic, Arcturus materialized. The orange star flashed over the eastern horizon as it has for millions of years, as it probably will for millions of years to come. Its sudden appearance took me by surprise, and as trite as it may sound, I'll remember that moment for the rest of my life.
It struck me that watching Arcturus was like viewing a time machine. The light reaching my eyes at that very moment had left the distant star some thirty-seven years earlier.
Thirty-seven years ago my family was having one of the best years we'd ever had, or ever would have. We'd moved to California for the year.
It was my first year in college. My parents were as happy as I can ever remember them being. I stopped cutting my hair and bought my very own copy of Egyptian Grammar, the great hieroglyphics work. I saw Citizen Kane for the first time, discovered Fellini films, went into my first real occult bookstore and met people who would change my life forever. It was a busy year that was filled with both losses and gains.
Sometime during that year I discovered what it meant to be me.
Through Arcturus' twinkles, I saw my mom laughing and haggling over the price of fresh fish in Santa Cruz. I saw my dad and I eating lunch in Berkley. My siblings were young once again, ornery and getting on my nerves. I could see my once in a lifetime conversation with a WWI veteran on a cable car in San Francisco. In another blink, I raised a glass of Port with my parents, toasting our family at the Paul Masson vineyard and in the next I was watching Watergate hearings with fellow students on campus in Los Altos and spending hours drinking coffee in the Stanford coffee shop.
Everything changed for me that year.
I finally met others as eccentric as I was. I became friends with a fellow who had perfect pitch; played the best boogie-woogie piano I've ever heard and claimed to be the illegitimate grandson of George Gershwin. I also became pals with a man who introduced me to Sam Wo's and The Pacific Café in Chinatown. Of Swedish descent, he always ordered in Chinese, drove a 1959 Plymouth that never went above 45 miles an hour and had huge fins. (The Plymouth, not my friend.) He owned a pet pig named Pete who weighed over six hundred pounds and had originally belonged to Sue Lyons, the actress. He also owned an estimated sixty-five thousand books.
I met:
Vietnam vets
Former Hippies
Current Hippies
Former Beatniks
Beatniks
Personal friends of The Grateful Dead
Personal friends of The Jefferson Airplane
Artists
Poets
A couple of Hell's Angels
And many, many more…
All of that occurred thirty-seven years ago when the light of Arcturus started its journey.
Everything was different then.
Everything is different now.
Everything will be different when the light leaving Arcturus today reaches us in thirty-seven years—everything.
How can something so simple be so immense?
All of these thoughts had rushed through my mind in a split second. I'd relived a year in a few twinkles of a star.
I looked at my watch—7:48. Twenty-three minutes had elapsed since official sunset. Twenty-three minutes of anticipation had given me more reward than I could have imagined.
Where were you thirty-seven years ago? Were you on the planet yet? If so, what was happening? Who were you? Who are you now?
Look at stars in the night sky and take a second to contemplate the beauty of the light reaching your eyes, light that was born in a different time.
I look up every chance I get and wonder what the world will be like when the orange gleam leaving Arcturus at that very moment finally arrives. I look inward as well as upward and feel the greatness of life and the gift of incarnation.
Look up and pick a star. It doesn't have to be Arcturus; just pick one. See your past, live your present and look with hope to your future.
Learn more about Mo

Bright ideas are flooding us with new energy and possibility. It's hard to know which one to pursue. Give it time and the best one will rise to the top.
Certain, stubborn problems can be solved with more love. Open the heart and be willing to be vulnerable. Take apart the defenses and let the chips fall where they may. This is better than staying in a stagnant and frustrating space. Love brings the healing we need and shifts us back to our faith.
The pace will pick up this week as we say goodbye to a situation that offered no movement, no excitement. Ambitions are growing in intensity and scope. It's important to break goals into small, manageable steps. We'll get there with diligence and focus.
Check out my new radio show Stonestreet Cafe, Thursdays at 7pm PST * 10pm EST. Wake up, warm up and discover more of who you are at 12radio.com.
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www.juliastonestreetsmith.com
Get a reading from Julia!


by Camille Licate
Along with being a "people person," Camille is a "pet person." Actually, she's akin to all animals, domestic and wild, and loves to use her gifts of intuitive insight to talk to you about your pet companion or explain to you the significance of a wild animal that may have crossed your path. Did you know that when you see an ant, it means to have patience, or a squirrel means to prepare for a new venture? Camille volunteers at The California Wildlife Center, working with animals like bobcats, hawks, owls, pelicans and lots of squirrels. She is the proud "Mom" of 7 Exotic birds and her rescue dog, Ollie. Learn about how animals can help you in your day to day life by the messages they give, and if you have a pet or animal related question, you can find Camille on 12Listen most days, if not, then by scheduled call.
While hiking the Santa Monica Mountain Range, I am always acutely aware that I am sharing the extraordinary land with the mighty mountain lion. With its stalking abilities, large canines, and brut strength, mountain lion demands respect. Mountain lions are excellent mothers, showing that they can be gentle and nurturing. Their hunting tactics are swift and cunning, showing that they utilize both their minds and their muscle.
Mountain lion can teach you that you can encompass strength and gentleness, wit and instinct. Balancing these qualities gives you the opportunity to live your life to the fullest and honor all parts of yourself. By honoring who you are – all of you – you are respecting yourself and others will follow.
Walk slowly and intently this week. Look around you and take in all of your surroundings and see what is serving you and see the things you need to pounce on at the right moment. Use kindness to get your point across and assert your views with conviction and confidence. Climb to the top of your mountain, enjoy the view, and embrace your life!

Each week Carolyn Ferris will pull from her hand designed Tarot cards to reveal a message for us. Carolyn has been a psychic for many years and has a substantial amount of notoriety with her art. She's done covers for Timothy Leary and Carlos Santana and her work can be viewed at her web site www.carolynferris.com! YES- she draws every one of them!!

Woman flying on a magic carpet with a small doorway to another world beneath her. Paradise everywhere. Magic Happens. Invite yourself into a silent retreat to listen to your soul's dreams and pray for them to happen. Help the magic along by taking the steps to make your dream come true. Then, keep a keen eye as you listen and watch for the magic of your dream to unfold in front of oaf
Get a reading from Carolyn!
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